It’s a fresh new year!
And if you are like me, you’ve spent some time reflecting on 2023 and dreaming about how to make 2024 better (even if it was between gatherings, making dinner, putting away the holiday decorations, emails, and getting everything ready for daycare or school again).
When reflecting, I ask myself "What has worked?"
And these 2 small, simple things have come up each year on my journey from being burned-out to becoming balanced.
I have my best 2 pieces of practical advice for you 👇.
Best New Year Advice #1: Take More Credit
Many times, we don’t pause long enough (or at all!) to even give ourselves the “pat on the back” that we deserve. 🌟
We keep making plans for how to make things “better”, but what about what we DID accomplish? Did we recognize that? Did we celebrate that?
Or did we wrap our congratulations to ourselves in shame or secret disappointment, trying to motivate ourselves to do even better next year?
🎯 Motivation grows with momentum🎯
And momentum is gained because you take continual SMALL steps. And what often keeps you taking those small steps is the RECOGNITION that it’s working or that you are doing the work, a little each day.
🌙 You won’t become a more present or fun parent overnight.
🌙 You won’t magically create a connected relationship again with your partner.
🌙 You won’t suddenly never feel like you are barely holding it together.
🌙 You won’t have zero guilt all the time when you start taking time for yourself.
BUT you can do these things over time. 1 example at a time builds evidence in your BRAIN. So take time to recognize the SMALL wins you have every day that contribute towards your goals, towards building the LIFE you actually want. ❤️
How to Take More Credit (practically) ➡️➡️➡️
⚡️ Keep a WIN log. A WRITTEN one. Somewhere. ⚡️
I have a spot for this on my Daily Success Plan (an integral part of the Motherhood Work-Life Success System). Each day, I try to write down 1 thing that I am proud of. Something that I did (or didn’t do) that in a small way contributed to the overall purposeful life I was building.
It could be a work WIN or a personal WIN. And they don’t have to be big and it doesn’t take long.
And this is NOT about bragging. Notice I'm not even showing or telling anyone about these things.
Well....I guess I am telling YOU 😁, but only because I think real-life exampless are always helpful.
Here are some WINs I recorded this past year:
🙌 Facilitated that meeting well (redirected back to task)
🙌 Was patient with my child this morning and didn’t yell (even though we were late)
🙌 Started an awkward conversation with my partner about a more even split of some household and kid stuff.
🙌 Got the slide deck completed in the 1 hour I allotted (didn’t need to be “perfect”)
🙌 Took my lunch walk today (even though I had a million other things that felt more important)
🙌 Put my phone away from 6-8pm to be present with my family (in a drawer in the bedroom)
The idea is that you start looking for what you are already doing RIGHT.
So momentum builds and creates the continued motivation that keeps you trying.
We too often find what's wrong, or what could be "better"...but what is already going RIGHT? We find what we are looking for.
P.S. I’ve also found it really helps when I commit to actually writing them down.
Best New Year Advice #2: Take 1 Thing OFF Your Plate
I decided a couple of years ago that I didn’t WANT to be busy. In all honesty, it was the pandemic that forced me to experience another way of life…and I ended up LIKING some aspects of it.
I didn’t WANT a life of rushing around, stressing about getting here and there and then there.
We only have SO much space on our plate (bad news). BUT we have more control over that plate and what stays and goes than we realize (good news). 💥
So…I’ve dove into that wise saying of LESS is more.
🎯 Saying no and setting boundaries on how much I do (and my kids are involved in), has allowed us to say YES. 🎯
It has created time and space for saying "YES!" to family game nights, unrushed dinners, and random Tuesday hikes or going to the park.