Exactly 3 weeks ago Friday, I was starting to feel......tired. I could tell something was coming, and was really proud of taking the weekend to just REST.
That seemed to do the trick and I resumed my regularly scheduled and packed week on Monday. 🙌
Well....I didn't know what was coming......(cue evil BWAHAHA laugh here..although I haven't much found the humor in my case yet)....Tuesday I was back in bed.
And for the last THREE weeks the entire family was sick, in varying degrees and for varying amounts of time. 1 positive PCR from the 4 of us...lots of snot, coughing, congestion....you get the idea. 😒
My husband is amazing (and got it last), so was caring for the kids at home as I turned in for bed basically after dinner each night. 😴😴😴 By week 2, the kiddos had perked up. I was still on 24 hour dayquil/nightquil/sudafed/tylenol (trying to not totally kill my liver)....so frankly, there was a lot of TV watching that week and delivery dinners. ✔️
By week 3, I was just irritated. My husband's worst days and had and gone. Despite my neti-potting, I still couldn't breath out of both nostrils at any one time and my energy was still too low to get any type of movement in (besides the necessary trips to my basement office). 🔥
It was during this week of irritation, I had to keep reminding myself how GRATEFUL I was. That we are not in the hospital (or worse), that everyone is back to healthy, and I was on my way to that...albeit slower than I wanted. ❤️
But throughout this whole thing - I canceled 1 day of meetings. ONE DAY. And it was the day I literally couldn't physically get out of bed. 💥
I kept my commitment to every other thing on my calendar (virtually).
💥And it's NOT something I am proud of.💥
WHY do we do that??
Why do we feel just because we are virtual, we can still do it? The mind processing is still there, the stress is still there. The NEED TO REST is still there.
Now, I'm grateful for my work-from-home situation so I didn't have to risk anyone else's health. I'm grateful I didn't have to use 3 WEEKS of PTO.
I think I would have gone a little crazy without something to do with my time. But maybe that's part of the problem. We don't even know how to properly REST anymore. 🤔
We can't give ourselves PERMISSION to move a deadline or to NOT sign onto a meeting - EVEN when we are physically sick - even if it is still virtual. I had no boss breathing down my neck (in fact our department is SO compassionate when it comes to this kind of stuff)...it was ME.
So... my proud moment 3 weeks ago (where I rested for 2 days HA) has lead to reflect more broadly. 👇
🎯 For anyone who needs this right now - give yourself some grace and PERMISSION to take a break 🎯